Sunset on Halloween

The sun is setting tonight on Halloween, slipping behind the trees that are nearly stripped of leaves after this week's strong winds. I noticed it as I took one of the dogs out. Another day, another month slipping away into the night, I thought, the light fading in the same way the year is fading. Can it really be November tomorrow? What happened to our early spring, the humidity of summer, the cooling days of autumn? The wind has blown more than leaves away. It has blown away time.

I know I talk about time a lot in these posts but I really marvel at how much quicker it seems to be slipping away. I suppose it has something to do with age. The year isn't broken down anymore into school and non-school, spring break and Christmas break. We get up, we go to work, we come home and have supper, we go to bed. Do children think about time? Or is it so much easier to contemplate it now that we are adults in the real world, taking responsibility for our own choices, becoming aware of our own mortality?

Halloween is very important to me. It's my favorite holiday in my favorite month in my favorite time of the year. I've always loved it, but I love it even more now because it was the night that I met my husband. We are celebrating tonight with some seasonal comfort food - slow cooker black bean pumpkin chili. It smells delicious. I can't wait to eat it and watch The Nightmare Before Christmas in front of the fire. Our street is short and sparsely populated so we won't get any trick-or-treaters. It will be a cozy night at home for us.

Halloween as we now know it has only existed for slightly over a century, perhaps even less. The ancient Celts called this day Samhain, which means "summer's end." It was the last harvest festival of the year, when all of the crops had been harvested and stored for the coming winter, when livestock were brought in from far fields and either stored away or slaughtered for food. The ancient Celts were very aware of the changing of the seasons, in a way that we are not aware of now. The seasons and the holidays all seem to blend in together, blurring through the twelve months that we call a year. Our survival no longer depends on whether we planted enough food or whether we had a good crop. We can go down to the grocery store and get whatever we want. Perhaps it's a nice convenience. Perhaps it's a bad one. Perhaps we are paying for the convenience with our health and our lives and our sanity.

Samhain was also a time to honor the dead. This is represented today in Catholicism as All Saints' Day and in Mexico as Dia de Las Muertas, or Day of the Dead. It was believed by the Celts to be a time when the veil between the worlds was at its thinnest. An excellent movie that explores this theology and the history of Halloween is Halloween Tree, an animated film based on a story by Ray Bradbury. Tonight I have lit a candle in memory of the loved ones that have gone before us. Their time is done. They no longer worry about the changing seasons, car expenses, taxes, or what to buy for Christmas. They are only love, pure and beautiful, love that shines down on us as we go through our busy day. They are the gentle voices that whisper comfort in our dreams. They are our guiding lights, and we will miss them always, until the day when we too are done with time and can join them in the peaceful light of pure love.

I encourage you to light your own candle and take a moment, somewhere between the ringing doorbell or taking your own children around, to reflect and remember your own precious loved ones, the ones who have left the physical world behind but are forever in your heart.

Grandpa Rhedin. Uncle Jack. Aunt Betty. Great-Grandma Kay. Grandpa Epperson. Great-Grandpa Gallaher. Great-Grandma Gallaher. The father-in-law that I never knew, my husband's father Rodney. My husband's Uncle Russell. Uncle Todd. Great-great-grandparents that passed when I was a child; great-aunts and great-uncles. The names become more familiar as I grow older; the grief becomes closer, harder. The sounds of their voices may become forgotten and their faces may be only memories, but they are all there inside of me, shining with love in my heart, watching over me and the ones they left behind. I honor them always, but on Halloween especially. I miss them and I love them, and I thank them for the gifts and the love and the joy that they brought me.

What Would [insert religious avatar's name] Do?

It's an election year. Thankfully we don't have any type of cable and are blissfully unexposed to the campaign commercials. However, it's still all over the news. I read the articles on it from time to time, depending on the headline. I will sometimes scroll down to see related headlines and my eyes will catch some of the comments. Everyone is entitled to their personal opinion, but what's with all of the hate? Today it really got me thinking about the way we choose to live.

Let's talk about the word "hate". It's a word that some parents tell their children not to say. It's said to be a strong word, a powerful word. As Yoda would say, "Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering." Do not underestimate the wisdom of little green Jedi. You may argue, whatever, it's a line from a movie, but it is far from just a quotable piece of dialogue. It rings with a deep inner truth, and you know what? Religious avatars like Jesus Christ and Buddha would agree with him.

Hate is an ugly word, and yes, it is very powerful. It's everywhere, spreading across the world like a disease, like a poisonous gas that slowly steals our breath away. It's in the news. It's in schools. It's in churches. It's in politics, it's in racism, it's in rioting, it's in personal relationships. It's all over religion. You may argue that most religions are "peaceful religions." Well, that could be true, if the actual original teachings were followed. Unfortunately, the original messages have been forgotten in the whole "My church is better than your church" or "You don't believe in the same things I do so everything you say is wrong" or the burning of books and religious buildings, wars fought in the name of religion, or protests at soldiers' funerals. So much hate is expressed "in Jesus's name." Do you really think Jesus would approve?

Jesus taught love. Jesus taught compassion. Buddha taught the same. Paganism's basic principles lie in love. I don't know much about Hinduism, but I can almost guarantee that it's a religion that values life and love. Your Creator gave you free will. Your Creator gave you the right to choose.

Why do so many people choose hate?

Here's a better question: Why would you choose to live your life in hate? What kind of a life is that? An angry life, bitter and short, full of high blood pressure, unnecessary stress, and possible heart attacks, divorces, estranged relationships, minimal joy, fear. Why would you wish that on anyone, especially yourself?

Hey, I know, we're all different people and we're going to disagree about politics and sports teams and stories with sparkly vampires. I'm a dirt worshiping tree hugger. I believe in renewable energy, sustainable living, and buying organic. I'm a dog person, I think the best show that was ever on television was Buffy the Vampire Slayer, I take my faith from multiple religions, and I read fantasy literature. I know plenty of people, relatives and friends and co-workers, who would completely disagree with everything I just said, but that doesn't mean I hate them. Hating is a waste of energy. Do you know where we should focus our energy instead? On love. Wouldn't living in love be a better choice than living in hate?

"In these bodies, we will live; in these bodies, we will die; where you invest your love, you invest your life. " - Mumford and Sons

Love is the highest emotion. Take a moment to think about the last time you were completely surrounded by love. Perhaps it was with your family at a holiday or on a trip. Perhaps it was cuddled up with your significant other. Perhaps it was petting your dog or cat. Wasn't it a nice feeling? You felt happy, peaceful, full of joy and hope. Imagine if you could feel that way all of the time. Then don't imagine it - do it. Be it, live it, breathe it, make it your intention and claim it. Live a life in love and be happier, healthier, better for it.

And then think about how wonderful this world would be if everyone learned to let go of hate and to live in love instead.

Arachne Weaves

About two weeks ago, I opened up the curtains in the library and saw this rather large brown spider scurry up her web. My first thought was to not open the windows; my second thought was, "What the heck kind of a spider is that?" I looked up images of the brown recluse and the wolf spider and it is (thankfully) neither of those things. I wasn't sure what it was until this morning, when I did a Google search on "brown spiders with brown and white striped legs." It's an orb weaver, known for its large, circular webs and is frequently seen in autumn, which officially started today (as our cooler temperatures can justify).

Let me tell you a thing about me and spiders. I really, really don't like them. I kill them when they get in the house (really, it's their fault, they intruded). I tend to just leave them alone when they're outside. In fact, there was a very beautiful green garden spider this summer by our tomato plant. I let it be. After all, it was outside. Spiders belong outside.

This orb weaver spider outside of our library is a type of spider I have never seen before. When I get home from work, I open up the curtains to let in some light and the spider goes scurrying up her web in alarm. I actually started opening the curtains just to see if she was still there. My husband said he would take care of her this weekend, but this morning I told him not to worry about it. She's outside. She has woven this huge and beautiful web. She's just hanging out there, catching bugs and chilling.

I did a little research on orb weavers. They are very helpful spiders because they eat mosquitoes. Those little blood-sucking fiends deserve to be eaten. I believe that is their only reason for existence, to feed larger bugs. Orb weavers are found just about everywhere in the United States. They are not venomous nor are they aggressive. She's really causing no harm to us by hanging around outside our library window. In fact, she's probably helping us by keeping our insect population in check.

I strongly believe in the spiritual symbolism of animals so I decided to look up spiders. There was one thing I knew for certain - a spider is one of the animals linked to the Greek Goddess Athena. I studied Greek mythology in ninth grade and she was always my favorite. There is a story in mythology that tells of Arachne, a mortal weaver who boasted she could weave better than Athena. Athena, by the way, is a Goddess of wisdom, weaving, and the intellectual side of war. There was a contest and Arachne wove a tapestry that, while beautiful, depicted the sins and secrets of the Olympian gods. According to the story, Athena was furious and turned Arachne into a spider. The name actually does mean spider in the Greek language.

The website I found is about totem animals and this is what it says about the spider:

"Spider: Creativity, Written Language, and Weaving Our Own Fate - Spiders, with so many multiples of eight, are linked to fate and destiny. They can spend a day weaving their web and if it doesn't work, untie it and let it float away. Spider can teach us to weave our lives, but we always have the ability to re-weave what we don't like. Spider in Native American myth and lore wrote the alphabet teaching the people to use words and writing. Spider can help you with your poses and poems creating new ways of expressing yourself. Creativity is always available when spider comes into your life."

Wow! That just fits perfectly. Our orb weaver is outside of our library, which is the creativity part of our house, according to feng shui principles. It is where our computer is so it's where I sit to write and to blog. I've also recently started listening to The Secret again in an attempt to remain more positive and create my life the way I want it. This all happened at the same time that the orb weaver showed up.

Animals of all shapes and sizes and species teach lessons, but only if we have the ears to hear, the eyes to see, and the heart to believe. They have a way of showing up in our lives exactly when we need it, like a message from our Creator telling us that we're on the right path, to keep up the good work, and to keep the faith.

And, by the way, we named her Gertrude.

Storytelling

Last night I went to a wonderful show. It's called The Unchained Tour and it's all about storytelling. The performers each had ten minutes to tell a personal story about something that happened in their lives. There were two musicians who would also play between sets. I have a deep love of storytelling and for me, this was one of the best shows to watch for inspiration. These performers are called raconteurs, and they told stories about going to school or meeting their spouses. Each performer told his or her story amazingly well, keeping my attention again and again.

The last performer of the evening was Neil Gaiman. Neil Gaiman is my favorite author. He can take the ordinary and turn it into something extraordinary. He is brilliant and funny and has written such wonderful books as American Gods, Stardust, and Neverwhere. He is also the writer of a highly successful graphic novel series called Sandman. He told a very moving story about going through a bad divorce and finding a dog that taught him how to just be happy in life. As a dog person, the thought of learning about life from a dog is an experience I can relate to. As a fan of Neil Gaiman, it humanized my favorite author. Often we put our favorite writers on pedestals and think of them as this beautiful, untouchable higher power that has been kind enough to grace us with whimsical nuggets of stories that we read and, for a time, escape into - which is what every good story should offer us, an escape. Any story that doesn't offer that is not worth reading.

I have admired Neil Gaiman for several years. The first book I read of his was Neverwhere, a story about a man in London who discovers a whole other secret, underground world living among the subway system. Currently we have just about every book of his in our library (we're only missing a few children's books). When my husband heard that he was coming to our city as part of this tour, he bought tickets for us right away. They were very inexpensive for the experience of an intimate night of storytelling. Tucked into my purse was a well-worn copy of American Gods, my favorite Neil Gaiman book and a book that got my husband through a difficult time in his life. We didn't know if we would get the opportunity to meet Neil Gaiman, and, if we did, we didn't know if he would be signing books. We were just happy to see him perform live. As I'd told my husband when he bought the tickets, even if Neil Gaiman only came out and talked for five minutes, that would be enough for me. It was enough to just see and hear an author who I loved and admired, an author who inspires me to write.

We arrived at the venue early and got front row seats with four of our friends, two of whom had also brought books to sign, just in case. The two musicians came on stage and the other performers walked in front of us to sit in couches. Neil Gaiman passed in front of me then. He passed in front of me again when they returned from a break. He came out and he told his story and the show finished. Some of the other performers stayed out but he went backstage. There was a young man who had a limited edition, hardcover copy of the Sandman graphic novels, and he gave it to another performer, who was kind enough to take it back and get it signed. We thought that it hadn't happened and we went outside, kind of talking about the evening and how much we'd enjoyed it. I heard that young man come out, and I heard him say that he had, in fact, gotten an autograph. We went back in.

The host of the show, Peter Aguero, came out of the back and I talked to him, telling him how much I loved the show and that I hoped he continued going with it (this was the third time The Unchained Tour has gone through the south but only the first time with Neil Gaiman). He said thank you and he hugged me and went outside for some air. A minute or two later, Neil Gaiman came out. He started walking towards the door and was stopped by someone, so we went around and came up next to him and waited our turn.

Neil Gaiman turned to me, smiled, asked my name, shook my hand. Somehow I managed to speak (I was afraid I wouldn't be able to). I told him that I admired him and how much I'd loved his story and how glad I was that he'd found happiness. I said that I had a book but it was okay, he didn't have to sign it. He signed it.

I left that encounter just glowing and giggling and completely and utterly geeked out. I sit here writing this and I still can't believe I got this opportunity. I have always wanted to meet Neil Gaiman and now I have, not at some gigantic convention or book-signing, but in a beautiful, intimate setting surrounded by others who love the magic of storytelling.

Someday there will be another young woman at a similar show, clutching a worn-out copy of a book and waiting, hoping that her favorite author comes out and that they'll exchange words and she'll get an autograph.

The author that she's waiting to meet will be me.

Autumn is Coming

To paraphrase Ned Stark from A Game of Thrones (and change the season) - autumn is coming. It feels so beautiful outside today. I love being able to finally open my windows and let some cool air in. Now let's just hope it stays this way! Weather in South Carolina tends to be on the milder side when it comes to the cooling down of autumn and winter (and on that winter note, I hope we actually have one this year).

I'm not sure how colorful the leaves will be this year. It's been a bit on the dry side. We'll try to go up to North Carolina and drive along the Blue Ridge Parkway at least one weekend in October. We might even make a camping trip out of it. There's nothing quite like the autumn color of the Blue Ridge. I think that to me, Heaven will look a lot like October in the mountains.

Autumn is also the time of harvest, the time to reap what you sow and prepare for the dark nights of winter ahead. It's a great time to look back on the year that's past and reflect on all the things that happened, whether they are good things or bad. Everything happens for a reason, and even if something seems really terrible at the time, it usually means something better came along after and the terrible time was just you learning to let go.

My husband and I got married in August and it was beautiful and wonderful and we're so glad that everyone could be there. My cousin is getting married in October and I wish I could go back to Iowa for it, but it's just not going to work out. I'm sad that I can't make it, but I know that her wedding will be just as beautiful and just as wonderful and that she's starting out on an amazing journey that I now find myself on as a new wife. I wish her all the luck in the world.

The leaves fall in autumn, drifting down on the back of the wind to cover the ground like a russet blanket. Life is like a leaf sometime. One by one, old pieces of you are discarded, falling into memory. You are constantly changing and growing in life, just like a tree. Admire a tree one day. Contemplate on how magnificent it is, one of the most marvelous living creatures on this planet. They can grow for so many years, getting taller and wider, forever rooted and yet constantly stretching. The path to enlightenment can be found in a tree. There was a reason that the ancient Celts held them in reverence. It might help us to do the same. A tree offers shade, it offers sanctuary, some offer food, and it offers fresh air for us to breathe. The world would be a sadder, more difficult place without trees. They are an important part of our ecosystem and vital to our survival. I love trees. There's nothing quite like a walk through a forest, no matter the season, marveling at the trees and the flowers and the life living underneath and among the branches.

Take time today to reflect on your own harvest. Did you plant the proper seeds? Do you feel fulfilled spiritually, emotionally, physically? If so, that's wonderful and rejoice. If not, then perhaps now is the time to change that, to make the decision that you will not settle for anything less than a perfect harvest.

Now is the time for cooler nights, for colored leaves, for football, for apples, for carving pumpkins and baking pies, for being thankful for all that you have. Enjoy your autumn! I hope that you always have a bountiful harvest full of love, joy, and peace.

Return to Earth

Hmm, haven't blogged since February. What have I been doing since then? Very little in the field of writing, not even with my books.

In fact, I feel like I've been floating along a lot these past four months, not really paying attention to the time that's passing me by. One time I had over a year to my wedding, and now I have five weeks. I'm not panicking about that yet, thankfully (and hopefully I don't). I know it will be beautiful and perfect.

One has to wonder (me especially) what else has been slipping me by when I haven't been paying attention. Lots of resolutions that I made at the beginning of the year, I'm sure, such as eating healthy and sending birthday cards. We had a plan for the yard, too, which has fallen by the wayside. We did go camping one weekend this month, but it was the first time we'd hiked in the mountains in eight months. Weeks fly by quickly and weekends even quicker - the year is half over already. It'll be Christmas before I know it. This is not good.

"Live in the present moment" is a teaching I've stumbled across a few times, yet I've never been able to fully grasp the lesson. If anyone has any ideas on how to do this, please share! One of the things I've started to learn is that I should never be afraid to ask for help. I may not always be willing to accept it, of course, but that's something I need to learn too.

You know how when you've slipped up on something, some resolution or otherwise, you often tell yourself, "Next year, I'll be better." Well, although it's coming up quickly, next year is still six months away. Why not start being better now? Why not look back over your resolutions again and see what you can pick back up today? Why not stop the floating along and return to Earth?

Return to Earth - this can take on so many meanings than just grounding yourself in reality. Mother Earth is a great healer and a great teacher. A tree can dig its roots deep into the Earth while still stretching up and reaching for the sky. You can do the same. Flowers start as small seeds in darkness and grow to become beautiful roses or lilacs or lilies. The seasons change and Nature doesn't resist. Nature changes with the spring, summer, autumn, and winter. Leaves unfurl, redden, fade to brown, and fall to the ground and in the spring, new leaves come again. Life is a beautiful cycle, and we as human beings are a part of that cycle. Indeed, our own lives are a cycle, from birth through childhood to adulthood and then on to old age and death. We share this cycle with all the living things off the Earth and so we are never truly alone on our journey through life.

Return to Earth - be aware of the world around you. Be grateful for every experience, whether it's good or bad. Be grateful for the people around you, the roof over your head, the food on your table. Take advantage of the bounty around you: love, joy, happiness, the fresh produce of summer farmers' markets, the glorious green leaves and bright flowers of the season, your family, your lover or spouse, your children or grandchildren, the puppies that greet you after a hard day, the friends who make you laugh.

Return to Earth - return to the spiritual roots that guided you through so much of your life. Your life, your choices, your likes and dislikes, the home around you, these are all products of you, and you are a product of your Creator. So is the Earth. Love and care for the Earth as you would a beloved family member, for you are a part of the Earth and she is a part of you. Embrace the Earth, and you will be embracing your Creator. In this embrace, you will find all the strength that you need.

The Daffodils Say That It's Spring

South Carolina generally tends to have fairly mild winters but what we've been having this year could be called anything but winter. There have, of course, been a few cold days but no snow. We've had some mild, sunny days as well as lots of rainy ones.

About three weeks ago or so, the daffodils in our side garden decided that it was time for them to push their way up. The lilies are acting the same, and the hyacinth - well, it's already been in bloom for two weeks. Some of the daffodils in the backyard are now open and a few are starting by the azaleas along the street. This morning, I saw a huge flock of robins in a yard.

I think the groundhog was wrong. Spring is officially springing in the south.

Now, this could be taken as a great thing and, believe me, I love seeing sunny yellow daffodils as much as the next person (except for those allergic to them, I'm sure). But it's just the middle of February and winter technically isn't over. I know there's some oscillation weather pattern thing that's keeping it mild (with the exception of Alaska) but what happens if that weather pattern suddenly shifts? What will become of my poor daffodils then if we suddenly get a freeze?

I suppose I shouldn't worry about it, like I shouldn't worry about a great many things that are beyond my control. This is a fault of mine that I've been trying to work on. Worry causes stress and white hair and wrinkles and heart conditions. I don't need any of that right now.

The arrival of spring, with the changing face of Mother Earth, has me wondering about my own personal changes. When the new year started, I opted for a healthier diet, giving up unnecessary things like fast food, soda, and processed sugar. I also tried exercising but I've been less successful at that, with the exception of getting at least a fifteen-minute walk in almost every day. The healthier diet has been easier to stick to than I thought, though I do have my occasional slip-ups. One thing I've discovered, though. If I try to take a sip of soda or eat a bite of cake, I just can't handle it. Too much sugar! I've really rather enjoyed my whole grains, fruits, vegetables, and salads.

Many other things will be changing this year and new phases in my life will be beginning, just as spring is beginning now. I hope I face my changes as bravely as the daffodils do and bloom into my own beautiful flower when this is all done.